I am on the brink of a nervous breakdown. I just know it. I don't know how to deal with anything anymore. I am so angry, mad, scared all in one. I don't even know how to let the happy show.
I take everything out on people around me and I don't know how to let them know that I'm scared I'm going to loose it. I don't know how to handle daily life. I have panic attacks and anxiety leaving the house or being in the car.
I should be thrilled. I am attached to this baby, I love it more than words can describe. But I am so scared to get attached....and then be let down. Chris says I can't think like that but I CAN'T HELP IT!!! No one understands unless you've been through it.
I am trying to deal with all the emotions. It makes me so sad that one of the most precious, wonderful blessings is growing inside me, and all I can do is be angry and scared. I am so emotional, and tonight is horrible. I want to just leave and let everyone be free of me being so weird.
Pray with me.