Monday, March 9, 2009

I'm Supposed To Be...

Blogging about how big David is getting. How he is thriving and doing so good at home with his family. I am supposed to have the same followers I had when I was pregnant rejoicing with me that all the prayers kept David here with us.

Now, I'm not saying I don't believe in the power of prayer because I do!!! And I believe our prayers kept David here with us for the time he was given by God. I am thankful he didn't suffer more than he had to that last day. But I miss my son.

I wish I was writing a happy, inspiring blog. Not one of sadness, and mostly me talking about being depressed. I want people to be inspired by the strength David had for the time he was on this earth, and to remember him. I actually started blogging the day I found out I was pregnant (I had another blog page, I moved to this one when we found out David was sick).

I miss my son with such fierceness that I can't even explain it. I have up and down days, but the down days are more and when I say down, I mean DOWN DAYS. I want to stay in bed all day, I want to hold my bear that wears David's outfit from the hospital and sleep. I've started having lots of weird dreams and I don't know what they mean, and usually I can't remember the parts I think are important.

On a happy note, Chris bought me a laminator last night! I am going to start making the bookmarks at home, laminating them and sending them out as I have the funds to do it. I am so excited about Bookmarks of Love/Families of Angels. I hope to help as many families as possible. If you want to know more please look at my previous post.

I miss both my babies. I love you Alyssa and David. Help Mommy make it through today.

1 comment:

Michele said...

Saying a prayer for you today...